On Pride and Patriotism

Been thinking a LOT recently. This will not be news to anyone who has read my 100 odd previous posts.

Today it has been mostly about patriotism and pride.

I just don't get it.

I am British. I was born here because my parents had sex here and my bio mum gave birth to me here.

Am I proud to be British? Erm, no.

I find it very difficult to engage in patriotism or pride in my country or whatever. Chiefly because I don't believe in borders. I know them to be a thing, this isn't like not believing in God, I just don't think we need them or should have them. I honestly think they have caused more trouble than they're worth.

With patriotism comes an over inflated idea of worth and entitlement. It leads to wanting to extend your borders and we all know what that leads to.

So, no, I am not proud to be British. All that means to me is colonialism and theft and murder. Not ever gonna be proud of those things. Ick.

I am a CIS woman.

Am I proud of that? Erm, no.

This is nothing I had any control over. When I was born I was assigned female and that feels right. It was genetics what done it M'Lud and I wouldn't change it. So my gender isn't anything to be inherently proud of unless you buy into the idea that being able to bear children makes you somehow superior which I don't. If you identify as a woman then that is good enough to me and I am not about to buy into a hierarchy of who is the 'better' woman. Patriarchy does that very well all by itself thank you, it needs no help from me. Also, babies are nice (I had three of them as it happens) but the biological equivalent of having a shit after you have eaten isn't actually anything to be proud of in itself.

Actually, if you look at it objectively then being a woman is a disadvantage. Patriarchy, pro lifers, lower wages, beauty standards, violence, fear.

Total pain in the arse in fact.

I am bisexual. Am I proud of that? Erm, no.

See above. Nothing I can control. Just my sexuality. Plus going down that road leads to things like Straight Pride and fuck that noise.

So, not proud of my gender, having given birth, the country I was born in, my sexuality.

Sounds a bit shit no?

Well no.

Because there are things that I can be proud of. Lots and lots of them. For instance:

I am proud that I fight for equality. I am proud that I am a feminist. I am proud that I take no shit.

I am proud that my children are decent human beings. I am proud that they can be who they are without worry that I will ever desert them for it.

I am proud that my no borders stance means that I will never hate someone, even in a 'jokey' way because they come from a different country to me.

I am proud of my LGBT activism. I may not be able to control my sexuality but I sure as hell can fight to make sure I and others are not killed for it.

I am proud of my creativity. My crochet and knitting. This blog.

And I am proud that I survive. That I thrive. That I am alive.

I am proud that I am able to have deep relationships and casual acquaintances. I am proud that I have come far enough to know the difference.

I am proud that I fight. For equality. For safety. Against prejudice in every form.

I am proud of me.

Hope you are proud of you too.

Deeva xxx